


Diastole

by TheBasilRathbone



Series: Pacemaker [6]
Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Alec and Ellie Are Already Together, Anniversary, Dating, F/M, Family, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Just People Being Happy, Love, Regrets, Tess pov, pre-established
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:55:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24082423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBasilRathbone/pseuds/TheBasilRathbone
Summary: They couldn’t make it work, the two of them, but there had always been something comforting about knowing he was there, knowing he was always willing to try, that he always just wanted his family back. If Tess didn’t initiate it, he would, and there was a certainty that they would always come back together.But Ellie had changed that.
Relationships: Alec Hardy/Ellie Miller, Alec Hardy/Tess Henchard (past)
Series: Pacemaker [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1652722
Comments: 16
Kudos: 134





	Diastole

**Author's Note:**

> Diastole: in the phase of a heartbeat, the period of time when the heart is at rest.

Tess was about three-quarters of the way through her second drink and already knew she’d need another.

It wasn’t even the worst date she’d been on in the last few years, sad as that was.

The man she was with wasn’t awful, exactly. At least he’d used a current photo on his dating profile. But he’d reacted in surprise when she’d mentioned her career, and even more so when they’d started to discuss their children.

“Your daughter still live at home?” he’d asked.

“Um, no. Well, sort of. She’s still in school, but…no, she lives with her dad. But, you know. She’s a strong-willed teenager, she bounces back and forth, when she’s at war with one of us.” She didn’t mention that Daisy had been living with Alec with a surprising amount of contentment for far longer than she had expected them to last.

“Strong-willed teenage girl?” Her date had said sympathetically, shaking his head. “She one of those _feminists_?”

It hadn’t improved from there.

Desperate to stay civil until the earliest time rolled around that she could politely leave and never contact him again, she didn’t even notice Alec walk in.

What he was doing back in his old town, she wasn’t sure, but he looked just as disgruntled and out of place as ever in a crowded place. He couldn’t have been working a case, he looked relatively well-rested, or as much as he ever did. He’d cut his hair, something neater and less scraggly, and grown out his beard a bit more than the scruffy state he usually kept it in, though that, too, was neatly trimmed. He’d even gained a bit of weight. Barely noticeable, but enough to soften his sharper features, make his shoulders look broader. It looked good on him.

She’d always found him reasonably good-looking, but it only became more apparent as he aged. He hadn’t lost a strand of hair, hadn’t even gained any significant amount of weight, nothing that didn’t do him any good. She even liked the facial hair, which surprised her. He’d kept it clean-shaven for the entirety they had been together. Compared to other men his age, the men Tess was seeing…he was something of a catch.

She normally wouldn’t allow herself to stare, but her date didn’t even notice that her gaze and interest had wandered, far too content to go on about statistical analysis of network data, or something of the sort, and hadn’t even paused to take a breath.

What had brought Alec out here? Not only to the town, but out to a pub? And a fairly trendy one, at that. It just wasn’t like him.

But just as she was watching him stare into his drink with a furrowed brow, he looked up and his expression softened, and Tessa felt her heart skip a beat. How long had it been since he’d looked at her with such an open, puppy-dog expression of admiration? But he wasn’t looking at her. He didn’t even see her. He was looking at the woman who was now approaching him, who Tess recognized immediately. Ellie.

She went straight to the bar where he sat and said something to him that made him smile, or as close to smiling as he ever came. She reached out casually to brush his hair away from his forehead and then leaned in to kiss him.

The kiss wasn’t anything scandalous, but it lingered longer than just a peck of greeting. She took a seat beside him, and Alec easily slung his arm around the back of her chair, leaning close to speak into her ear, as if the music was far louder than it was.

If it hadn’t been for Ellie, Tess knew that she and Alec would have gotten back together by now. Not that it necessarily would have stayed that way, but they at least would have tried.

They’d been back and forth a few times since the divorce, and even though it had never stuck, there was something comforting and familiar about being together.

The trust was gone, the love was difficult, but there was routine. He struggled with relationships, struggled to vocalize what he needed, and so as the only person who knew him, knew what he liked to hear, knew what he needed in bed, she could always offer him some form of comfort and decent sex. But his foul moods and long hours set in, and her patience ran dry, and they’d separate after a while, only to grow lonely and displeased with dating and come back together again for another go.

Until Ellie, that was. She still didn’t know what exactly about the woman had captured him. She was pleasant enough looking, Tess supposed, and seemed relatively nice from the short interaction they’d had, but she’d somehow managed to hold onto him when no one else could stand him.

Ellie had been a hot topic in their household before Daisy had moved to Broadchurch with Alec. Tess and Daisy had always bickered and clashed, and when the Gillespie trial had plastered her affair all over the papers, things had fallen apart completely. That Alec had a new girlfriend provided Daisy with a novelty that had only added fuel to the fire.

 _“I told you to finish this days ago, what have you been doing all this time? You’re staying here until it’s done, you’re not going to your dad’s until I’m satisfied,”_ she had demanded during one of their fights.

_“You can’t keep me from going to Dad’s. Ellie’s coming over for dinner, he’s asked me to come. I haven’t seen her in ages, I’m going.”_

_“I don’t care about Ellie, you’ll do as your told. Ellie’s not your mother.”_

_“I know she’s not,”_ Daisy had spat back. _“She couldn’t be, could she? Me and Dad are actually happy when she’s around.”_

Tess knew it was wrong to resent Ellie, that it wasn’t fair, but she couldn’t help herself. Ellie had come in when things had been so difficult, swooping in and saving the day, leaving her in the dust and Alec and Daisy with an excuse to not have to resolve things at home. 

She’d waited for the inevitable end. Dating, at this age, with a job like theirs? Tess had been lucky to get a couple of months out of her own attempts at relationships since the divorce, and she wasn’t as bitter and obsessive as Alec.

But against all odds, it hadn’t happened. He’d actually moved to her little hometown to be with her, and Daisy had willingly followed.

She remembered seeing them during the Gillespie case. He’d asked for her input as a detective who had worked on the original case, and she had seen first-hand his attachment to her, his respect for her as a detective. Tess had tried to help, tried offer her assistance, missing seeing his passion and relentless drive during a case, but he’d rejected her again and again, even for the simplest tasks. _No, I need Ellie_ , he’d say, brushing past her without a second look. They’d been relentlessly professional during the case, and Tess would barely have known they were together, if it weren’t for their little slips during moment of exhaustion. Ellie rubbing soothing circles into Alec’s back when he could barely keep his eyes open, Alec unthinkingly calling her ‘Love’ while they bickered.

Tess remembered his face when Ellie had discovered the identical receipts, receipts that suggested the Gillespie home had replaced the bloodstained floorboards. _Miller, that is outstanding!_ he’d cried, planting a kiss to her forehead and striding off, Ellie flushed with pleasure and following at his heels.

When the Ashworths had been arrested for the murders, she’d tried to find him, armed with some minor paperwork to be signed off on. Someone had pointed towards an interrogation room he’d disappeared into with some files. The door was still ajar, and she turned the corner to find them at the interview table, their chairs pushed together, Alec _sobbing_ in her arms.

 _“Christ. M’sorry for this, I jus’ need a minute,”_ he’d stuttered, face buried into the crook of her neck. _“After all this time...I couldn’t o’ done this without you.”_

 _“You have nothing to apologize for,”_ Ellie soothed, one arm tight around his waist, the other stroking soothingly through his hair. _“You were wrong, what you told Lee, you know that? We are not alone._ ** _You_** _are not alone, Alec. I love you. So much.”_

_“Ellie…”_

_“Shh. It’s alright. It’s done, now. You’ve done it. I’m so proud of you, Alec. So proud. Don’t you ever forget that.”_

Tess had backed out of the room, stunned. She’d left the paperwork on his desk for him to sign.

Even now, as she managed to feign some interest in her date’s dull ramblings, she couldn’t help but quickly glance over at her ex-husband throughout the night.

His arm only moved from the back of her chair to the inside of her thigh and back again as they chatted and laughed, Ellie turning to smother her giggles into his shoulder. At some point they ordered chips, and she waved one in front of his face until he rolled his eyes and plucked it out of her hand. Every once in a while they’d stop to kiss, just briefly, only chastely, but lovingly. They weren’t loud or disruptive or obnoxious with their affection, no one else seemed to notice them there, but Tess couldn’t take her eyes off them. She wondered if she and Alec had ever looked so happy together.

Her own date ended with a half-hearted ‘we should do this again sometime’ and an uncomfortable peck on the cheek. She had hoped to slip out unobserved, but Alec had risen from the bar to pay his bill, and ever the observant detective, his eyes were drawn to her when she stood up from the table.

Tess gave an awkward half-wave, cursing herself for now having to go over and speak to them.

“You’re a long way from home,” she said uncomfortably as she approached where he sat at the bar, thrusting her hands into the pocket of her coat for lack of something better to do. Alec had returned to his seat, tucking the receipt into his pocket, his arm already resting on the back of Ellie’s chair again like it was stuck there, although his date had disappeared. Her coat and phone where still there. Just in the ladies’ room, then. “I heard about the solve. The…serial rapist case. Congratulations. Out celebrating?” She and Alec used to go out for drinks to celebrate case solves, in the beginning.

Alec cleared his throat. “Of a sort. We’ve…actually been together two years, now. Didn’t realize it’d gone past during the case until after we’d solved it.”

“Two year anniversary?” Tess said. “Goodness. Well, even more congratulations are in order, then.” Alec nodded stiffly.

“You…on a date?” He nodded towards the door where the man she had been with had exited.

“Um, yes. Yeah. Went well,” she lied. She hated this, being the one awkward and alone while he was here with his long-term partner.

Always shit at small-talk, Alec fell silent.

“How’s Daisy? Haven’t heard from her in a while.” She wished she could employ his help, ask him to badger Daisy about calling her back, but she knew she couldn’t. She hadn’t gone out of her way to encourage a relationship with him when Daisy had refused to return his calls after the divorce, she could hardly expect him to do it for her now. Besides, Daisy was older, more strong-willed. A teenager now, hard to make her do anything she didn’t want to, these days.

Alec’s expression softened, as it always did when Daisy’s name was mentioned. “She’s good, yeah. Likes ‘er new school. Bored to tears in a small town like Broadchurch, but she’s made friends. Her an’ the daughter of one of Ellie’s mates are attached at the hip. Think I’d have to pry them apart.”

“Chloe?” Tess asked, and Alec nodded. “She mentioned her, last time we talked.” _Can’t come over this weekend, Mum. Chloe and I are going to a music festival on the beach._ “You look well, you know. I almost didn’t recognize you. Forgot what you looked like when you’d eaten something and had a decent night’s sleep.”

“Solving a case will do tha’,” he replied, relaxing back against his chair and running a self-conscious hand over his neatly trimmed hair. “Though part of it’s Ellie’s doin’. And Daisy. Naggin’ me to take care o’ myself.”

“You seem surprised. You’d forgotten what it’s like to have women around.”

To her surprise, the corner of his mouth quirked up. “Yeah, I did. But I got Ellie’s boys, so I’m not so badly outnumbered.”

“Ellie’s got kids?” she asked. She wasn’t sure why it surprised her. Daisy hadn’t mentioned it, but she didn’t mention much to her now. Perhaps Ellie had said something when they were working the Gillespie case, she couldn’t recall.

“Two boys. Wee one’s only six, Daisy adores ‘im. She scraps with the older one like cats an’ dogs, but I think they jus’ do it ‘cause they never had a siblin’ their age to mess with. They jus’ like to bicker for the sake o’ bickerin’.”

She knew she shouldn’t comment, she really did, but she couldn’t help it. “You seem...happy, Alec. Are you?”

Alec seemed equally caught off guard that she would comment, but he eventually nodded. “Yeah. Things are goin’ well. Too well, maybe. I...honestly, I’ve been waitin’ for the other shoe to drop.”

Tess raised a brow. “What does that mean?”

He sighed. “You’d call me a cynic.”

“I call you one anyway. Might as well say it.”

He was silent for a moment, as though weighing whether or not he should tell her. “It jus’ seems too easy. Things shouldn’t be this easy. I keep waitin’ for things to come crashin’ down. Pippa’s case is solved. The sexual assault case is solved. And Ellie…she’s been so good to me. Too good to me, better ’n I deserve. An’ Daisy meetin’ Ellie, me meetin’ the boys, Daisy meetin’ the boys, us movin’ to Broadchurch. Workin’ together. It’s all been too smooth. Nothin’s done us in, makes me suspicious.”

Tess couldn’t help but shake her head incredulously. “You’re suspicious because things are going too _well_?”

Alec shrugged, taking a sip of his drink. “Maybe suspicious isn’t the right word, jus’…wary of gettin’ too used to this. Sometimes I jus’ lie awake and look at ‘er an’ think… _Christ, it’s goin’ to hurt when she leaves me._ But I told ‘er that once and she called me an idiot. So maybe she’ll stick around.”

That familiar pang of guilt clenched in her. She couldn’t have done this to him, surely. Made him expect a miserable ending to every good thing.

 _If she’s smart,_ Tess wanted to reassure him, _she’ll know better than to fuck this up._

“Daisy seems to like her,” she supplied, something she was only offering up out of guilt.

He smirks at that. “Yeah. She does. Thank Christ. Ellie an’ the boys. Was nervous about that, but she’s adjustin’. Overheard her talkin’ to a friend the other day about her ‘annoying little brother, Tom.’”

“Brother? Wow. That’s a big thing.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Sorry,” said a voice behind her, and Tess turned to see Ellie herself, looking apologetic. They’d spent little time together, at Alec’s bedside after his heart surgery and then during the Gillespie case. She’d looked rumpled and exhausted, then. But they were on a date, weren’t they, and now she was wearing trousers and a nice blouse, a bit of makeup, her hair was loose. She looked as warm and relaxed as Alec. “I didn’t want to interrupt, but I look like I’ve been skulking over by the toilets, people were starting to think I was a pervert.”

Tess stepped out of the way, and Ellie cheerfully slipped back onto her chair, meeting Alec’s gaze with a very pointed look that clearly said, _are you alright?_ As though Tess was the big, bad ex-wife, coming over to start a fight. She nearly scoffed.

“I really am sorry to interrupt,” Ellie said, turning back to her.

“Don’t be,” Tess said tightly. “I was here on a date, we spotted one another when I was on my way out. Alec was just saying you’re here on an anniversary dinner. Seems like an odd place to come to celebrate, if you don’t mind me saying.”

To her surprise, Ellie laughed warmly at that. “It is, definitely. Wanted to come back to the place it all started, a romantic anniversary thing. Bit shit, this pub, but it’s where we first met, so we’re stuck with it.”

“ _This_ is where you first met?”

Ellie shrugged, looking a bit sheepish. “I was here on work and stopped in for a pint. Alec was meeting another woman on a date.”

“Were you?” She’d always wondered. 

He looked almost embarrassed to admit it, though she wasn’t sure if the embarrassment was due to his current girlfriend or ex-wife. “It fell apart before it even started. Ellie came to my rescue.”

“Not exactly the most romantic story,” Ellie joked, though there share a look, and Tess suspected in that moment it was a great deal more romantic than they were letting on.

“Well, you’re both detectives. Could’ve been worse, you could have met at a crime scene,” Tess supplied, and Ellie laughed again, tilting her head back unselfconsciously and squeezing Alec’s leg.

“There we are, let’s count our blessings. We could be having an anniversary dinner in a back alley right now.”

“Or by that pornographic mural spray-painted by the docks,” Alec added, smirking. Tess didn’t allow herself to stare as he absentmindedly played with the hair along her back that brushed his fingertips. She doubted he even knew he was doing it.

“Aw, no, that’s all been painted over.” She frowned at Tess. “Shame, really. A giant, anatomically-correct penis really spruced the place up.”

Despite herself, Tess chuckled. Christ, Ellie was charming. It was difficult to dislike her, even with Alec looking at her like the sun rose and set on her.

An electronic chirp interrupted anything they might have said next, and Tess looked down at the phone perched on the bar as the screen lit up with an alert.

The lock screen photo made her pause. It was a group photo taken at a beach, a dramatic scene of high cliffs in the background. They all sat on a picnic bench in the sand. Alec was off on the end, one arm stretched around Ellie, the other hand keeping steady a gleeful, curly-haired little boy who had draped himself around Alec’s shoulders, mid-laugh. At his side was Ellie, windswept and smiling, her hand on Alec’s thigh while the other arm was tight around Daisy. Daisy wasn’t even looking at the camera, she’s sticking her tongue out at a tall boy, undoubtedly Ellie’s other son, sitting on the table behind her with his arm wrapped around her neck in a headlock, mussing her hair. If she didn’t know them, know that it was _her_ daughter sandwiched in the middle of that group, she’d have commented on how beautiful their three children were, what a lovely family they made. It’s a chaotic scene, and one that looked so joyful it made Tess’ heart ache just thinking she had missed out on a moment where Alec and Daisy were so happy.

It was only a fraction of a second that she could look, as Ellie made a noise and grabbed the phone off of the bar to take a look at who had texted. She snorted.

“It’s Daisy. Group project is done, she got home safe and sound. Said her and Tom just ordered takeaway. She’s shaming me for raising a child who puts pineapple on pizza. Rude, that is.”

“She’s right,” Alec scoffed. “Your biggest parental failure.”

“Oi, when you eat more than rabbit food, you can have an opinion. Fred likes pineapple on his pizza, too, you know.”

“Wee Fred is a hoover and will eat anythin’ you put in front of him. Edible or not.”

“Three kids and yet you’re the picky eater of the lot. You could learn something from my child.”

“Like not to shove legos up my nose?”

“Poor Freddie. I said he was a good eater, I didn’t say he was bright.”

Knowing when it was her time to leave, now that they had forgotten she was standing there, Tess cleared her throat. “I’m going to pop to the ladies’. It was nice seeing you both, enjoy your night.”

She turned and didn’t look back. She’d forgotten what Alec was like, when he wasn’t working a case. Sandbrook had beaten him and broken him down for so long. He’d been distracted, determined to solve it to the detriment of everything else in his life. Not to mention their own marriage imploding during that time. He was still dry and sarcastic, but more rested, now. Relaxed. Like he’d completely started over, in a way. New heart, new girlfriend, new town, new job. New step-sons. New family.

And it was strange to see him so adoring of someone else. Reopening the Gillespie case had only made it clear what an uncomfortable feeling that was. From her desk, Tess had heard his voice plead “ _C’mon! Please, Love,_ ” and had snapped her head around habitually, only to see that he had been speaking to Ellie, whose resolve was evidently beginning to weaken on whatever they were bickering about. Her heart unexpectedly squeezed at realizing the pet name no longer belonged to her.

They couldn’t make it work, the two of them, but there had always been something comforting about knowing he was there, knowing he was always willing to try, that he always just wanted his family back. If she didn’t initiate it, he would, and there was a certainty that they would always come back together.

But Ellie had changed that. He had a new family, now, one that he adored. This is what he’d always wanted, really, she could see that. A loving, attentive partner (and Ellie was clearly mad for him) who could handle all of his eccentricities, a job he succeeded at, his daughter happy and healthy. A family. She’d resented him when they were married, felt he was too relentless with everything, that he expected too much. Now she resented that this other woman seemed to be able to give him everything he needed with so little effort.

She hid out in the ladies’ room for some time, and when she emerged, they had long since forgotten her, ankles entwined under their chairs, heads bent together. Ellie was showing him something on her phone, something that was making him smile. With a grin, her hand went up to teasingly scratch at his beard.

She slipped past them, relieved and perhaps just a bit disappointed when they didn’t even notice her pass.

She wasn’t sure why, exactly, but she busied herself in her car, just for a few minutes, delaying setting off on her journey back home. Eventually, not long later, they emerged from the pub, jackets over their arms. Alec slung his coat on quickly and then turned to help Ellie into hers. She turned back to him, giggling, and reached up to straighten the collar of his coat, folded from hastily throwing it on.

Grinning, her hands slid down to the lapels of his coat, tugging them gently once and then using them as leverage to pull him into a kiss. Alec wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly against his chest, both of them swaying gently, and Tess could feel the phantom strength of his hands on her own back. She knew just what it felt like.

It wasn’t a new, exciting, rip-your-clothes-off kind of kiss, either. It was deep, and slow. A kiss between two people who were desperately in love, even after the honeymoon phase of a new relationship had ended.

It occurred to Tess, then, that she wasn’t sure she had ever felt that way in a relationship, after the fireworks had faded. Monotony had so often led to boredom, not the comfort of trust and stability.

They were speaking, now, heads bent together, Alec’s arms around her waist, Ellie laughing, rising up again to press a kiss against his jaw, his neck. He rested his cheek against the top of her head, eyes fluttering closed as he held her.

After a long moment, Ellie broke away but took his hand, leading him up the across the car park and towards the inn across the street, undoubtedly their destination for the night. A little holiday from their demanding jobs and their three shared children.

The receptionist would greet them as they went past, thinking about how sweet they were, about how in love they looked. Alec would huff, embarrassed by the attention, but be secretly pleased that his happiness was so obvious after being unhappy for so long. He would think about how much nicer it was to be the one barely able to resist snogging his partner in the lift instead of watching a happy couple stride past him as he sat alone at the bar, trying not to count in his head exactly how long it had been since he’d last been touched. He got to be the one happy and relaxed and in love, this time.

Tess knew him well.

As they faded into the dark, Tess waited a long moment before turning the keys in the ignition. She tried not to look back as she pulled out of the car park and set off on the short journey home to her flat.


End file.
